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Regular Season Game 18: New Jersey Nets – Cleveland Cavaliers December 4, 2007

Posted by netsophobia in Central Division, Cleveland Cavaliers, NBA previews, NBA talk, New Jersey Nets.
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NEW JERSEY NETS (8-9)
CLEVELAND CAVALIERS (9-9)

Look, I know that’s a bad outburst of sorts, but dude, we’re 1/5 into the season but the team’s still having lineup issues? I deserve that outburst, I got my rights, I watch the Family Guy and I hate George Bush, sue me. Anyway, over the years, well, after Damon Jones signed with the Cavs, we get to see his relationship with LeBron dwindle, from having that gayish handshake to almost kissing each other..

To LeBron finally adknowledging that Damon Jones’ talents are better suited for playing in that professional league in Tahiti, and to the point where LeBron ends any verbal contact with Jones thru a simple yet defnining word, well two words, fuck off.

Maybe LeBron was pissed at Damon Jones trying to chew a piece of his market, you know, the China shoe market, the Nike Zooms vs the Damon Jones brand, 1% is alot in China, somewhere like a million maybe, imagine a million people wearing Damon Jone’s signature shoe, it’s like Earth being invaded by mutated toilet seats right out Jason Collins’ apartment window. Scary. Next thing we’re gonna know is Damon Jones launching his own apparel brand and calling it Jonesihana, challenging top brands like GAP and whatever. Ew

I bet nobody knew that the last time these two teams met, Isiah Thomas was up somewhere calling some roughed up nut sack to rough someone up, and if anyone would bother the guess who the person is, the answer would come out glaring at you, Aleksandar Pavlovic, wow, big deal. dude can’t even keep to his word to play in Europe and heck he resigns for maybe even less, all hail Varejao! Remember the time when LeBron said that anybody on his team would be successful, well we’ve got a perfect example already, look at Larry Hughes, he suck but obviously he’s enjoying life right now with the money that was supposed to be Michael Redd’s, instead he’s got all the money now and he’s using them to buy more lotions because he thinks that the Sun in Ohio is to hot for his liking, he misses D.C for fucks sake, Free Larry.

Drew Gooden is probably the classiest of players among the Cavs, look he doesn’t wear weird suits, he doesn’t suck, he doesn’t act hurt like someone, he isn’t Lithuanian, and most importantly he doesn’t bite his fingers like he hadn’t ate anything for a century. BUT, he does have his ultra weird hair sense that could only possibly come out from a Cleveland Cavalier. Damn, no wonder Bron rooted for the Red Sox. Nobody told Homer Simpson that he was actually like Big Zy when he was young, just that he turned out yellow and had a big belly to go with.

Ignore all the crap above, We all know that the Cavs suck (wll, at least I know), BEAT THE CAVS, whom I hope are playing without LeBron who probably is depressed because he couldn’t bite his sprained finger or something. Besides, the Cavs are in a losing streak of their own, plus without Lebron James, their team is err err errr errr as good as ours, well although technically we’re no longer the lowest scoring team in the league but our offense still suck and their defense is excellent, so all the luck from heaven and hell to the Nets to save me from sidebar updating duty for another day, Good lord.

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